Wednesday, November 11, 2015

LESSONS I'VE LEARNED FROM LIFE




This haphazard list was compiled quickly and is presented in no particular order. Random thoughts inspired by personal experience. Don't expect anything witty, profound, or philosophical.


1. Modesty and goodness will get you absolutely nowhere.

2. Seize the moment. You'll probably never get a second chance. 

3. Think carefully before you speak.

4. Think even more carefully before putting anything in writing. It will eventually come back to bite you on the ass.

5. Never count on anybody for anything. The only person you can fully rely on is yourself.

6. People who act like they know the most usually know the least.

7. You can't please everybody. Don't even try.

8. Life is 90% illusion. Nothing is what it initially seems to be.

9. Anger and grudges are a waste of time.

10. It's extremely easy to criticize. 

11. Happy endings don't exist.

12. Think carefully before saying "I promise" or "I do".

13. Never forget the past. It is the foundation of what we are today.

14. Don't rely on the future.

15. Time is precious. Use it wisely.

16. Falling into routine is dangerous.

17. Follow your gut instincts. 

18. Never repeat your mistakes.

19. Curses always come home to roost. Do I ever have a true story to tell about this one.......

20. Never criticize anyone until you've walked in their shoes.


21. Always read the fine print - - numerous times.

22. Never trust an attorney or a realtor. Or a moving company. BITTER personal experience....... 

23. The less said, the better. 

24. Never eat burritos in Tijuana.

25. Never eat at a salad bar or buffet - anywhere.

26. Never go to bed on a full stomach.

27. Never begin a new relationship when you're lonely or desperate.

28. Never say "I love you" while in the ecstasy of having sex. You'll regret it in the morning.

29. The only monogamous man is a dead one.

30. Priests are perpetually horny.

31. The most vocal homophobes are often the biggest closet queens. 

32. Anyone who says things get better with age is full of shit.

33. Never underestimate your own abilities or self-worth - -  there are too many other people eager to do it for you. This one is my favorite.

34. Time doesn't heal wounds - - it only obscures them.
      I originally wrote that when I was a teenager, and I still   
      believe it today. 

35. Life is a consecutive series of misery, disappointment, pain, struggles, obstacles, worries, detours, tribulations, grief, uncertainty, agony...............and then we die.

Is there a #36? 
Well, if you insist......
Never post videos or poetry on your blog. Distant yawns will be audible.
Am I just being a sarcastic wise guy here? Naw - not a chance.




P.S.
Feedjit keeps mysteriously appearing and disappearing on my sidebar.
I'm still having trouble with the font sizes - which keep changing inexplicably. 

this link is here to force you to my other blog:


Cabinet of Curious Treasures 





   
  


18 comments:

  1. A veritable treasure trove of a list here, Jon. I hardly know where to start. A number of truisms towards the latter end, some of which might be regarded as superficially humorous but contain reality. Well, okay, I'm looking particularly at 30-32.
    I halted at #9 as I know one of my greatest faults is my inability to forget (and forgive?). Wish I could let grudges go but they seem to sink so deep that I can't root them out and am condemned to carry them around forever, like one of Hell's punishments I experience in advance of arriving there.

    I'm with you on posting of ones own poetry - though reminders of certain well-recognised 'classics' are usually nice.

    I'll have to return to your list for another bite later.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I was initially hesitant to post this list because I thought it was rather nonsensical. Some of these, I suppose, are tongue in cheek but all (??) have a ring of truth.

      I do agree that it is often difficult to suppress anger - and even MORE difficult not to hold grudges, but I seem to have mellowed in my "old" age. I simply don't care about things as much as I used to.(believe me, I used to hold grudges.....)

      30-32:
      Yes, I've had personal experiences with a horny priest.
      Many homophobes harbor immense self-hatred due to their repressed sexual desires.
      Growing old is definitely a bitch. The Golden Years are often over-rated.

      I occasionally post my poems simply to express my inner feelings, but I'm sure my sensitivity and feeble efforts aren't appreciated (or understood) by everyone.

      Delete
    2. Oh, I see that my response has got 'Lost in Space' - and not for the first time.

      The only part I'll repeat now is that I must be about the only one who's had a Catholic College education, (run by Marist priests), and NOT having even heard any stories or rumours about a single one of the priests teaching there (there would have been about 15 at that time) let alone having been a victim to any unwanted advances/gropings etc. I don't doubt that it's going on even now in some parts of the world but I guess I ought to be counting my lucky stars that I escaped such. Sorry to hear you weren't as lucky. (I've a feeling I remember you've mentioned your unfortunate experience before at some time.)

      - Fingers crossed again - now click......

      Delete
    3. I'm so sorry that your original comment got lost in space. It's happened to my comments in the past and is extremely frustrating.

      I should have been more specific about the priest. It happened when I was in my 20's and it was mutual consent. I wrote two poem that were "inspired" by the relationship - - "Sacraments" and "Confessions".

      I also know numerous other incidents concerning priests (personal acquaintances) which I can't mention on a public blog.

      Delete
    4. Ah well. 'Consenting adults' puts a different complexion on what I'd taken it as - even though it was a most heinous 'mortal sin' in the eyes of 'The Holy Mother Church' - and hence God herself!
      But I've also never known anyone who has such stories to relate. Maybe I've lived an especially sheltered life.

      Delete
  2. No.27!!! Been there and done that! With both men and women. Doesn't matter the sex if you're in a bad place, you sure don't need bring any innocent party with you.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm learned some bitter lessons from #27 and I'd never do it again.

      Delete
  3. Now I want to hear about curses that come home to roost!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I knew someone would eventually mention that. I will (probably) summon the courage to write about it soon.

      Delete
  4. ...Nodding like a bobblehead over here at #'s 1 and #7. Actually, all of these beat those cute samplers sold in gift shops everywhere. In particular? ...

    #11 ... You're seriously breakin' my heart.
    #13 ... Thank you for affirming my instincts!
    #19 ... Inquiring minds want to know more!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. "Nodding like a bobblehead" - that's funny. I like it. These "lessons" come from my heart, but after reading them again (#11) I can clearly see that my pessimism is showing.

      I will write more about #19......soon.........

      Delete
  5. #5 - so true
    #6 - my boss
    #7 - I don't
    #13 - FUCK YEAH!
    #15 - FUCK YEAH!
    #31 - so true
    #34 - so true

    #32 - not true (for me personally)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I have mixed feelings about #32.
      I like myself much better now than I did 20 years ago......but I hate the physical ravages of aging.

      Delete
  6. Great list, I could add never believe anything management tells you....

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I can relate to that - judging by some experiences I've had with management.

      Delete
  7. I like #2, I am in double trouble on #22 - licensed in both professions.

    ReplyDelete
  8. All good points Jon. Where your staying. I love the slightest. First wanted to that I disagree but overall it right on the mark.
    Ron

    ReplyDelete

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