Well, not exactly a meltdown. It was more like freaking out (is that term still in existence?). I'm generally calm and reasonably patient, but occasionally I lose it and freak. It depends on how much I'm provoked. And how many unpleasant things are overwhelming me at once. Tonight I felt overwhelmed.
Perhaps I'm merely tired of winter. And cold. And snow. There was more snow on Valentine's Day (and for those of you who read my previous post - yes, I did have pizza on Valentine's Day).
Since Tennessee - God, will I ever learn how to spell it?? - is considered to be a southern state, I assumed that the winters would be mild here. I expected snow and fairly cold winters - but my expectations were also fanciful and -perhaps - delusional.
I had envisioned this mountain wilderness to be inhabited by Heidi, Old Yeller, and Bambi, with the Waltons throwing innocuous snowballs and the Von Trapps singing Edelweiss.
Instead, I feel like a member of the Donner Party, The Forlorn Hope. I'm fastening snow shoes out of birch bark and imagining the cats roasting on sticks over an open fire.
Speaking of cats, in the middle of my meltdown tonight I accidentally tripped over the cat food dishes that I keep in the kitchen. Two full dishes of food and a bowel of water went everywhere. It's not the first time. Nor the second time.
Then, my laptop refused to accept my computer password. I couldn't get online for over an hour. This caused genuine panic. I finally figured out it was the Num Lock key.
Then I remembered that Bosco had been messing around near my keyboard earlier. Damn cat! Bosco is the same culprit who knocked the "i" key off my computer keyboard a few months ago. No, it isn't fixed.
And then there is the nightly visitation of the coyotes. At around 3:00 a.m. almost every night a pack of coyotes comes on my property and seemingly surrounds the house - howling and yelping and making bone-chilling taunting sounds. They never stay for very long.
I had to put some important letters in the mail box, so I summoned my courage and decided to go just before the crack of dawn. It's a very long walk, down an icy, muddy, tedious hillside (mountainside) and I always dread it immensely. I put on my heaviest winter coat and took a walking stick, cell phone, and flashlight.
Just as I got to the box I heard the coyotes howling again, but this time in the distance. I had a major adrenaline rush as I was laboring up the steep hill to get back to the house.
I've thrived on danger most of my life. It's some kind of a pseudo-masochistic thrill that I crave. I'd probably be lost without it.
More of my Hollywood stories coming up. I know you're enthralled at the prospect.
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