Friday, April 13, 2018

FRIDAY THE 13TH



I had no intention of writing about Friday the 13th, for two reasons:

1. I'm not particularly superstitious

2. I generally have bad luck every day of the year, so Fridays with 13 in them are no particular problem. 

Early this morning - after about two delightful hours of uninterrupted sleep - I was rudely awakened by creatures running across the roof. It sure as hell wasn't Santa Claus, but sounded (to my untrained ears) sort of like a herd of antelopes. 

I leaped out of bed in my skivvies, grabbed a broom, went outside, and started banging the broom against the edge of the roof. Whatever the creatures were, they took off.

My banging not only scared the rooftop creatures, it annoyed a bunch of nearby wasps...
the weather has warmed up and wasps and bees are rampant...

A mob of angry wasps descends upon me like kamikaze pilots. I'm barefooted, in my underwear, frantically swinging the broom to ward off the attack. I manage to open the back door and get inside. As I'm breathing a quasi-asthmatic sigh of relief, I realize that one of the wasps got inside with me.

The wasp chases me around. I chase the wasp around. Long story short - - I eventually manage to clobber the wasp with the broom and beat him to a quivering pulp.

I look sweet. But I'm tough.

Since returning to sleep is now completely out of the question, I fire up my laptop and decide to do some work (I'm working on several new projects, to be mentioned in the near future).

I'm at the computer less than five minutes when there's a power failure.
It's very windy today, which - I assume - might have had something to do with it.

Half an hour later the power's back on but my laptop is strangely screwed up. The screen keeps going black. I can't access any websites. I have to reboot several times before things straighten out.

Meanwhile - -

I decided to boil some eggs. No big deal. I've done it before millions of times (I counted).


Back at the computer, twenty minutes later, I suddenly remember the eggs when the pot boils over - drenching the stove and popping all the eggs wide open.
This has never happened to me before.
Was I merely careless, or......

Did Friday the 13th have something to do with it?

My day has definitely been off to a bad start. But - in retrospect - most of my days have a bad start...and inevitably a bad finish.
I was cursed.

Totally unrelated:
Did I ever mention that I used to be a HUGE fan of the TV show Friday the 13th: The Series?
It was only on for three seasons - - I think from 1987-90.


Ryan, Micki, and Jack

Have a pleasant Friday the 13th...
and try to avoid black cats.

 With love, Bosco
 

15 comments:

  1. Just reading a Stephen King with a massive storm in it - always a good element in a horror film!

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    Replies
    1. I'd rather read about a massive storm than experience one. The thorn bushes and wasps are bad enough.

      (the worst storms I've ever experienced in my life were in the Missouri Ozarks - and they are very frequent there).

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  2. Jon, I believe you've just nailed the Clement C. Moore award for describing unusual rooftop visitations. I now realize Santa allied himself with a winter holiday because he didn't want to deal with the damn wasps. I learn here. Great post!

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    Replies
    1. Geo, I get more unusual rooftop visitations here than I'd care to remember - and most of them occur late at night. This early morning one surprised me. I still haven't figured out what they are. Squirrels??

      The wasps and bees are extremely aggressive this year. I got chased several times while cutting the thorn bushes.
      I think Santa escaped to Texas...

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  3. Two words: Oven cleaner (aerosol).
    ... OK kill me, that was 3.

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    Replies
    1. I'll have to put it on my shopping list.
      I killed a spider once with Lysol.

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  4. My Friday the 13th was much better then my Thur. the 12th. Lots of cats around here but no black ones.

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  5. Fortunately I didn't have any more bad luck after my miserable morning. The rest of the day was okay.

    I've heard that black cats are an omen of good luck in Japan and Asia.

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  6. Meanwhile, your neigbors if they could see you are probably saying, "Oh look... the cowboy out there....he's out there in his underwear again, swing at imaginary beings. We've really got to move."

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    Replies
    1. Thank goodness I have no neighbors around here - except for the cows. And I hope they are myopic.

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  7. I have an unreasonable fear of wasps and bees when they even think about chasing after me. I think it was Friday the 13th out to make life tricky. ;)

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    Replies
    1. There are an enormous amount of wasps and bees around here and some of them are really aggressive. There are many times during the summer when I'm very hesitant to go outside.

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  8. your friday the 13th didn't sound too bad compared to some other days you've had. bosco looks sweet.

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  9. The sight of you in your undies didn't scare away the critters, amazing day.

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  10. Friday the 13th: The Series
    yes
    I'm a fan, too

    Bosco = good luck

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