LOST IN JUNE

What a depressing post title. I'm thinking of all the things I have lost, due to this endless medical debacle in which I am trapped. My freedom, dignity, privacy - - and physical capabilities. Not to mention mental capacities.

My mind is ruthlessly numbed courtesy of medications.

But I don't want to depress those  kind and caring people who dare to visit my blog. I greatly appreciate you. You always listen politely - - no matter what crap I spew.

Speaking of crap.....(here comes a smooth transition)

Yesterday, the food was unusually crappy here at Signature Health Care. The "good" cook must have had time off.

I was presented with breakfast pancakes that were so tough, I had to hack them with a knife. How is it possible to make impenetrable pancakes? Add spackle to the batter?

To make breakfast more challenging, they forgot to give me pancake syrup. No problem. I put grape jelly on them.

Lunch  was over-baked pizza. Tough as corrugated cardboard. And - - - - - it was served with BROCCOLI!! I kid you not. Have you ever heard of pizza combined with broccoli?

Well, yesterday was Friday the 13th. Bad luck? I'm not superstitious on one day. Heck, I'm plagued by Foul Fortune most of the time. Balszerencse. An old Hungarian curse.

This weekend yields an interesting trio - - Friday the 13th, Flag Day, and Father's Day.

Some photos, inspired by the trio.

Me, commemorating Flag Day.

But wait - - I'll have to reveal the truth. That photo was taken when I lived in Texas. I "edited" it with Freepik especially for Flag Day.

Here is the original photo. I was holding a Confederate Flag.

What about Friday the 13th? 

All I could come up with are these two photos which were also taken in Texas.

Me, showing off in a wheel barrow in my TX back yard.

It suddenly toppled over, dumping me on my head. I suppose that's sort of bad luck......

What about black cats on Friday the 13th?

One day (here in Tennessee) my cat Bosco decided to relax on the coffee table.

While I was taking pictures, he decided to yawn.

Bosco was a sweetheart, but he looks scary in this yawning shot.

And Sunday is Father's Day.

I could write a book about the turbulent, devastating, destructive, incredibly violent relationship between my father and me.

It was simply (??) due to his insanely violent temper. To this day, I shudder when I think of the absolute horror my mother and I went through. But enough.....it's all past history.

In moments of uncontrollable rage, his viciousness knew no bounds. Jekyll and Hyde. He could be kind, generous, even very humorous. He could be a monster.

I got savage beatings with buckled belts when I was a kid. He fractured two of my ribs when I was fourteen. Attacked me with a shovel once. Handed me a loaded gun once and begged me to kill myself. The time when he choked me into unconsciousness, I got his gun and (almost) attempted to kill him.

That's when I took off for Hollywood.....hustling the midnight streets....on an unbelievable journey......but you heard this before.

My father had a very tough life. He had a lot of personal demons to contend with. I forgave him in his old age. What else could I do? 

In raw retrospect, I wasn't perfect. I had my own demons and harbored an enormous amount of hate. There was a difference....

....my father released his hate on others. I had self hatred. I was extremely self destructive. 

Almost angelic? My father John, age eighteen or nineteen. Yes, his eyes were that blue.

That was his brother's car, my guess around 1938

In the Navy, dad is on the right

My mom and father in Atlantic City, before they were married

Barbeque in California. I was seven ( holding dad's can of beer). Sorry, these ancient photos are blurry.

Me and my father. He was near 80 in this photo.

So many memories, echos of the distant past.....

Jon, 🩵  remembering one heckuva long incredible journey.

Happy Flag Day

P.S.

A big thank you to Dorothy for your cute (feline) card. 😻 I tried to email several times, but kept getting a Mailer-Daemon return.