ANOTHER....BIRTHDAY

 

Without a doubt, this is absolutely the worst birthday of my life - - - and, believe me, I've had plenty of rotten ones.

No reason to celebrate for being a year older. How old am I? Older than lost centuries long ago.....I had one helluva existence.

Ironically

Over two years ago in July, 2023, the doctors in Centennial Medical Center in Nashville, told me there was no hope at all. I was sent back to Cookeville Medical Center.

Honestly, I was so sick at that time - with cancer and heart trouble - that I didn't care.

Should I have lived just to go through the pain and suffering I have now?

Life is an extremely complex journey. That's the nicest thing I can say about it......

I've been in at least four hospitals and one...(cursed)  nursing home. Now two.

I'm like a wandering gypsy. The only difference is that gypsies are free. I am completely restricted and restrained, like a prisoner.

I'm rambling, as usual. Saying too much. It's my style....it's all I have left.

So, what am I'm doing now? I'm stalling, not wanting to mention it.

My insurance is running low. I was literally thrown out of Cookeville, after two weeks and two days.

The only place left where I could be dumped without insurance problems was the unheard of Waters Nursing Home located in unheard of tiny Gainesboro, TN.

Looks great on the Website photos. Looks like a comdemned prison from the Civil War in real.

I was horrified when they wheeled me through the filthy time-worn front doors. Everything inside is cramped, dirty, archaic, and overcrowded. The "residents" here look like they're cast off extras from the movie "Freaks" (the 1932 film directed by bizarre Tod Browning - - look it up).

So, how bad is this place? It makes Signature Health Care in Jamestown look like the Ritz.

They stuffed me into a small cramped room, with a roommate two feet away (but we're divided by a curtain. I'm by the window).

They already wanted to move me to a different room but I refused.

Everything is chaotic, no regular schedules, the workers quarrel constantly, some of the nurses are tough and nasty. But there are some nice workers.

The food is appalling. The meals are small and haphazard. Everything mashed together with no thought. And they are mystery meals. I can't discern what's on the plate.

Yesterday they ran out of food and coffee for breakfast. They gave us horrid scrambled eggs, a stale roll, and warm apple juice.

I survived a helluva lot of unspeakable things in my time. Can I survive this?

I'm getting mentally and physically weaker. How will I be able to tackle physical therapy when I'm too weak to move?

Endure what I can. Make the best of it. Try try try.....heck, battling agony is my specialty.

I'm tired of writing. It's 5:00 a.m. and I didn't sleep. This bed is uncomfortable.

Suddenly, I feel a year older.

Jon  💚

Wolves, howling at the moon.