Saturday, February 14, 2015


My initial plan was to post some delightfully bizarre vintage Valentine cards today, but I noticed that several hundred other bloggers had the same idea - - and the same Valentines.

Consequently, I'm being forced to wing it and give a completely impromptu dissertation. Beware.

The post title has little to do with the content. It was only intended to grab your attention.

I remember a time when a Valentine's Day gift consisted of a simple box of chocolates and a greeting card from the Five and Dime (if you don't know what a Five and Dime is, you're too damn young to be reading this blog). Nowadays, a gift for Valentine's Day involves maxing out your credit card. Diamonds, maybe? A trip to Bora Bora? How about a new car. 
Fur coats are out. Wear one you'll get snagged and skinned by a member of PETA.
I'm not complaining. I'm just saying.

Remember those little boxes of colorful candy Conversation Hearts? Necco still makes them, but the messages on the hearts have changed drastically. Instead of saying Be Mine, Kiss Me, & Love Me - -  they are now embellished with Text Me, Tweet, & Girl Power.

Valentine's Day was devised solely for the pleasure of women. Men hate it, though they're afraid to admit it. Just like they hate weddings and anniversaries. Lately, however, I've observed that more & more women are becoming less & less concerned about Valentine's Day, too. After all, it's just another big, brash, mercilessly commercialized money-making racket.

Despite being an extremely romantic sappy sentimentalist - -  I've never cared a cat's whisker about Valentine's Day. There's no way that I want to be cajoled into faux romanticism on one particular day of the year. It's in direct contrast to my nature. Romance and expressions of love should be spontaneous and genuine - - not mandatory.

I'm not about to buy dust-collecting, mite infested teddy bears. Whenever I buy candy, it's for my greedy self. 

Were you expecting flowers? I'll send you a package of seeds. That's an old joke but a funny one.
So why aren't you laughing?

When I was a child in grade school we were compelled to exchange Valentines with every kid in our class - - boys & girls alike. It was an exercise in fairness. They were those little penny Valentines that were cute and benign. I don't think they make them anymore. Nowadays, nothing is cute or benign.

I emitted a wistful sigh after saying that. Good gawd, I'm archaic.

Do I believe in true love? 
Yea, about as much as I believe in Cupid or the Tooth Fairy. I'm getting cynical in my declining years.

Actually, I do believe in true love - - but it's only rarely experienced in a lifetime. Infatuation and lust are very often mistaken for love. I've been infatuated hundreds of times - and in lust more times than Satan could count.

The most intensely passionate, absolutely perfect relationship of my life - - which was the ultimate personification of true love - - unfolded like a great romance novel but ended in tragedy and untimely death. I hope to write about it someday. 
I later tried to replicate that true love many times, but never could.

I'm starting to get too serious, which wasn't my original intention.

What I wrote about love long ago still largely expresses my sentiments today, so I've extracted it from mothballs to quote once more:

The elements of true love encompass every emotion and strike every age - awakening dormant spirits, igniting the innermost regions of the soul, expanding far beyond the emotional or the physical, soaring towards the realms of the universe into the sacrosanct blessedness of eternity.

One of my all-time favorites:
I'm Still Loving You, by the Scorpions
(with English and Spanish lyrics)


  1. You echo my sentiments exactly, "Romance and expressions of love should be spontaneous and genuine - - not mandatory." Happy Valentine's Day, Jon.

  2. Happy Valentine Day Jon. My husband told me to just get me what I wanted for Valentine's Day so I went out and bought me the biggest Diamond I could find. Just kidding, I do have to get for myself and most times it's a box of candy, but I did get a red rose this year it only cost $10.00. I really don't think much about gift giving to each other when I want or need something I get then. Take care, Jean.

  3. I have never seen an assessment of Valentine's Day more accurate and equitable than yours. I can only add my personal objection to Cupid. Winged or not I have never been comfortable around babies with bows and arrows. Babies are easily distracted and their aim is just awful. Best wishes of the day, Jon!

  4. Spot on! And I'm waiting until tomorrow when all the overpriced chocolates and candies are half price or less for my greedy self, too!

  5. John bought me two chocolate candy bars with groceries today. I don't think he knew it was a Valentine's present.

  6. I'm happy not to be the only anti-Valentine's soul out here! Factor in, I'm not fond of diamonds, dislike (most) flowers and don't care a whit for chocolate ...ya, I'm a disgrace to my gender. (Usually, I smile and go along with sentiment before someone realizes and casts me out like a leper.)

    Nevertheless, one of my grade-school pals wrote about exchanging penny Valentines in one anothers' mailboxes (decorated white bakery bags) ... which made me smile. Remember those?

    For a myriad of reasons (well, only one - intensely personal) I'm keenly interested in your story of true love - and loss - Jon ... only if and when you're ready to share.

  7. Jon,
    Ah yes, you bring back long ago memories of Valentine's Day from my grade school when we were forced to exchange Valentine's Day cards with our little pink smelling girl classmates. Of course I liked the cards more than the little girls, not that they weren't nice. And I remember those little heart shaped pure sugar Necco made candies too. These days I don't do Valentine Day but one thing I have found, there is true love. I looked for it my whole life and, as you know because I've been writing about it often enough (and even as I type this he is sending me text messages) I found it with my Canadian friend Pat. I never knew that love could be like this, so deep and abiding. Of course there is the sexual attraction (very, very strong) but more than that, it is the soul. Two alike. I truly met my soulmate. I know this is hard for some people to understand but I love Bill (the man I've been living with for the past fifty years and married for over a year now) and we will never part as long as one of us is alive. But this love I have for Pat transcends anything I've ever known before. All I can say that I hope you too will find our soul mate some day and I have a strong feeling you will. You're too nice of a guy and have too much to offer to not share all your goodness with other likeminded soul.

  8. We never had that custom of exchanging valentines at school. It's a nice idea. I I think a love cut short by an untimely death is terrible in two ways, one because of the death and the other because there is no returning and no second chance. I'm so sorry that your great love ended that way.


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