MONUMENTAL

Even though I have some (probable) good news to proclaim, I'm still in a dire mood. Not fit to be congenial, considerate, or compatible.

And those are only the Cs.

My blood pressure is still alarmingly low. Beyond extinction low. I had three (3) ocular migraines yesterday. Weak. Exhausted. Extremely moody. 

I'm in my darkest Heathcliff Mode.

Not in the mood to enthrall you with my extraordinary music....or  colorful atypical writing...

Today I'm colorless....monochromatic.

Whispered

Music? Writing? Don't emphasize your positives, Jon. The blogosphere spoil sport cannibals are preparing to cook you.

Watch it - - I'm toxic, lethal, inedible.....but also addictive.

And indigestable.

But.....what about the key word, Jon? The title of this post....

MONUMENTAL

did you forget it??

Hey, Kemosabe, I don't forget anything. I'm a vindictive psychotically sensitive Hungarian. I remember people that irked me when I was six years old.

I don't forget.

Oh, yea, monumental things are happening here in the putrid bowels of PhysicalTherapyLand.....and BlackMagicMedicalHades.

I put up such an unrelenting fuss about the abject incompetence around here and the seemingly indifference to my serious medical issues - - - that they FINALLY listened!

I will be starting radiation therapy in Cookeville Medical Center at 9:00 a.m. Monday, Sept. 29th.

Five consecutive days of radiation on my arm.

An Aside:

Two years ago - in the exact same place - I had SEVEN WEEKS of radiation.....along with seven weeks of chemo.

It was an adventure.

My Monday ride there is scheduled and - - somebody told me - - it's "etched in stone".

If it's not etched in stone, you can be damn well certain that it will be. I'm not putting up with any more of their CRAP.

I'm suffering due to their neglect.

I'm hesitant to post this epistle. It's absolute crap.

But even my absolute crap is interesting. At least I'm not boring.

I made another A.I. creation just for you - cornucopia at the top.

I like it. Hopefully it won't scare anybody (referring sarcastically to my previous post)

Jon 💜 almost monumental

ESCAPING INTO AUTUMN

The photo of the blood soaked towel on my previous post was admittedly disgusting. I just wanted to show what I've been going through - - for a long time.

I've got to extract myself from this never-ending nightmare before it's too late.

Fact can be much more frightening than fiction.....and I'm in the ugly midst of it. 

As my inevitable means of internal escape, I'm offering more of my recent autumnal creations.......that is, what I imagine autumn could be.

Nothing extraordinary. Just simple things......

Tame the sweet forest

Potential jack-o-lanterns and pumpkin pie

The persistence of time

Waiting for a special midnight visitor

Secret of the Crows

Siesta with the leaves

Impromptu Incident with the Geese

Gathering Place of the Spirits

Ghost Stories

Solitude with the Poet

The Long Way Home

The Owl's Watch

Afternoon in Stitches

Curious Encounter (above)

Since Sandi disliked my initial children with wagon and pumpkins, I'll try another.

???????????????

Well, that's a glimpse into my autumnal imagination.....which is somewhat limited

Jon  🍁🎃🍁

GOLDEN AUTUMN, BLOODY AUTUMN

Post title sounds like a cheap horror movie ploy. It's my cheap ploy. Last night was a reasonable facsimile of a horror movie, I suppose.

Background Effects

Thunderstorms all night long. Thunder rumbling. Lightning flashing in the window by my bed. The cancerous "wound" on my upper arm started to bleed, as usual, seeping through the bandages, as usual. Nothing new. Daily (nightly) occurrence.

This is the blood "seeping" through the bandages onto a towel - - it hasn't really started bleeding yet. I endure this EVERY DAY. How would you like to go through this daily ???? No exaggeration.

 Photo taken last night.

Bad Part

The only night nurse on duty is the (extremely) incompetent one. Is perpetually clueless. And has an EXTREMELY potent hillbilly accent that I can't understand.

Starts ripping bandages off, unraveling me like a mummy. Blood gushing everywhere.

"What should I do?" "How should I wrap it?"

I understood that. I'm nearly fainting.

"Maybe I should call the Hospice nurse...." she suggests.

"OK," I reluctantly agree, desperation.

Hospice is shit. They're eagerly waiting for me to die.

Hospice Nurse arrives in about an hour...in a raging thunderstorm.

"Why do you want radiation therapy?" she demands.

So I can live and kill you.

"So the bleeding will stop," I tell her.

She is no frickin' help at all.

My radiation treatments start....supposedly.....next.....Monday.....29th

See my previous posts

IF I get the radiation, I'm dumping Hospice. They're complicating everything.

I'm losing an enormous amount of blood - - ever since April. APRIL!!! Spring.

Result? Extremely low blood pressure, constant fatigue, dizzy, queasy, fainting, migraines, chest pains and burning.....

Secretly I ordered Iron pills and B12 vitamins from local Walmart...take them daily. I also ordered dried fruit and mixed nuts for nourishment.....and a jar of chocolate peanut butter. Yes, chocolate. I eat these things at night.

Better than the crap they serve here.

I've got to get outta here.

Alive.

Jon, half dead...but nerves of steel......❤️  Endurance

More autumn pics in my next post.....just to irk you.

Even through bloody hell, my talents thrive.  😈