Tuesday, January 15, 2019

THIRTY




Thirty questions and thirty answers.
The questions were lifted from Sunday Stealing


1. Are you filled with joy today?
I haven't been filled with joy since Rocky and Bullwinkle was on afternoon TV and Black Cow suckers were five cents.

2. Has it been a rough week?
It's been a rough life.

3. If given the opportunity, would you like to star in a musical?
Yea, I'd like to play the lead in Hello Dolly.

4. Name one person you'd take a bullet for.
Hell, I can name fifty people who I'd like to put a bullet THROUGH.

5. Did you trip over anything today?
Early this morning I went into the tiny bathroom adjacent to my bedroom and tripped over the cat's litter box. I landed on the toilet and almost went through the window (no lie).  

6. Is your favorite color yellow?
Why yellow??
Actually, my favorite color is blue. My second favorite color is yellow.
Does this disqualify me?

7. Were you born in a hospital? Do you know the name of the person who delivered you?
Contrary to ugly rumors, hospitals did exist when I was born - - and I was indeed born in one.  
The person who delivered me was Dr. Moreno.

8. Have you ever had a friend or relative that's incarcerated?
When I was a young, wild, uninhibited hellion in California, I had a very (very very) close "friend" who had been in prison for attempted murder.   
I could write a book about that relationship.

9. Do you enjoy romantic movies even if they're cliche?
Almost all romantic movies are cliche.
And I enjoy them.

10. Ever been to Rhode Island?
No, but it's on my "must do" vacation list.

11. Can you read music?
Well, let's see:
I majored in piano, minored in composition, studied conducting, played cello in a chamber group, performed a piano concerto at Cal State Fullerton, gave recitals at UCLA,
and played piano in some of the trashiest bars and clubs in Southern California.
I can probably read music.

12. Are flowers a nice gift to give someone?
Only after they die.
If someone wants flowers, I'll send them a package of seeds.

13. Do you wear any jewelry? 
I used to collect antique (ancient) jewelry. Unfortunately some of it mysteriously "disappeared" when I moved from Texas to Tennessee.
I still have one Russian bronze cross that's about 300 years old.
And I wear (alternately) several antique rings. My favorite is a sixteenth century ring from Italy. 

14. Have you ever laid in a field of flowers?
No, but I've gotten laid in a place that had poison ivy. Happened in the Missouri Ozarks. And I'm still itching.

15. Do you like tea?
I am a tea addict. I drink copious amounts of tea. Hot or iced.

16. What word do you have trouble saying?
Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious.

17. Favorite fairytale.
Fairy tale?
Heck, I don't know. How about Oscar Wilde and Alfred Douglas. Or Paul Verlaine and Arthur Rimbaud?
Or are you looking for something more Grimm?
Perhaps Hansel and Gretel. 

18. Do you sleep with stuffed animals?
No, but I sleep with my cat Bosco who's heavier than a 30 lb. sack of potatoes.

19. Do you prefer the city or the country?
Depends on which city......and which country.
When I was young I loved big cities.
Lately I prefer rural areas. The more isolated, the better. 

20. Are you a big fan of makeup?
Only when I'm in drag.
Seriously, though, there's nothing more spooky than a woman whose makeup was applied with a pallet knife.
Less is better. 

21. Favorite drink?
Alcoholic or non-alcoholic?  There are far too many to list.

22. What's the longest time you've stayed awake?
I have absolutely no clue.

23. Do you like spring?
I have nothing against it.
I love the transitional seasons: autumn and spring.

24. Lipstick or lip gloss?
Neither.

25. Are aliens real?
I never believed in aliens until I lived in West Texas.

26. Does your zodiac sign fit your personality?
Let's see. Sagittarius.
Intelligent, passionate, musical, poetic, witty, fascinating, handsome, versatile, mysterious, creative, unique.
Yea. It fits.

27. Favorite sea animal.
Killer shark.

28. Are you a nice person?
Let's put it this way:
sometimes I'm so nice that I scare myself.

29. Night or day?
Depends on whether I'm up or sleeping.
Actually, I have always been a night person. I am a hardcore night owl. I'm never fully awake until after midnight.

30. What would make you happy right now?
A few million tax-free dollars.
Eternal youth.
Perfect health. 

I'm not asking for much. 
                  
                 
  

Saturday, January 12, 2019

QUIET NIGHT

It's a damp, chilly night with intermittent rain and sporadic, unenthusiastic snow flurries. Not nearly as frigid as the last few nights were, so I don't have to worry about the water pipes freezing.

It's also an unusually quiet night. No coyotes, no owls, no annoying animals scurrying across my roof....... but they will inevitably show up - just after I crawl into bed and snuggle comfortably under the covers. They wait patiently until they're sure I'm nearly asleep.

Then I jump out of bed, run outside, and bang on the roof with a rake or mop or whatever the hell is handy.
That discourages them from scurrying........
......until I go inside and get back in bed. Then the scurrying begins again.

It's an unwholesome nightly ritual.

Anyone who's in favor of gun control should live out here in the boonies and be subjected to overhead scurrying every night when they're in bed.
Trust me - you'll be loading your Remington 870 and aiming to kill. 

Well, that statement probably inspired some people to scratch me off their reading list.

Relax. I'm (basically) a pacifist. I don't like bloodshed of any kind. But not every animal in the wilderness is Bambi.
And if I ever catch any human (or half-human) invading my property and threatening me with bodily harm, I won't hesitate to blow their sorry ass off.

I look deceptively sweet and innocent, but I'm armed and occasionally dangerous.

Yesterday afternoon there was a fair amount of gunfire nearby. Probably hunters. I was outside taking a few pictures, when the shots inspired me to go back in.

Here are some of the photos:
(nothing spectacular)



I love these tall trees and often photograph them simply because they're right near the back porch. That's the afternoon sun in the western sky.

I'm extremely tired tonight and think I'll go to bed early. It's presently only 1:30 a.m.

That's early for this hardcore night owl.