What should a blogger post when he's in a foul mood and doesn't feel like writing?
Answer:
Boring photos that nobody wants to see.
Three sunny, hot days in a row! That's an incredibly rare event in Tennessee. I took advantage of the great weather - -staggering around the steep inclines of my Hillbilly Estate, valiantly battling acres of weeds that are nearly as tall as myself (I'm 6' 1"). I sprayed and trampled, cut and slaughtered, and was making fair progress (despite my screamingly bad back and the fact that I'm 150 yrs. old).
Then -
yesterday afternoon, the Evil Gods of the Backwoods Mountain saw my progress and decided to nip it in the bud.
I heard the unnerving sound of distant thunder, and felt the humidity intensify. I helplessly watched as dark clouds rolled in .....and could do nothing to roll them back.....
It began to rain, the rain turned into a deluge, the deluge became a torrential downpour - with thunder so deafening that my cats scrambled for cover and I began to regret my sins. It poured all afternoon, with Biblical fury.
All the weeds that I killed seemed to be miraculously resurrected and new ones sprouted alongside them with alarming vigor. I could hear the weeds growing all night, while they laughed with vindictive delight.
In the feeble light of dawn I saw a tremendous crop of new weeds - bigger, stronger, and greener than the ones I had demolished. My three days of work were completely eradicated. I would now need a tractor to get through them.
Well, shit. I give up. I surrender to the Gods of Nature (and the Goddesses, if you want to be politically correct).
Jon, for someone who wasn't in the mood to write, you're doing a helluva good job.
So where are the photos?
I thought you'd never ask.
There are many wildflowers amongst the weeds (I used "amongst" just to irritate Spell Check)
I didn't take any photos of the weeds because I didn't want to depress you.
The sunlight was dappling the leaves on the morning before the storm
Scratch, my 10 yr old feline, relaxing yesterday afternoon - trying to ignore the 94 degree heat (that's Fahrenheit, for those of you in Guam)
This is how Scratch looks on a good day
Scruffy, taking a rare break from being feisty and getting into trouble.
Bosco, who is lazy, obedient, and dislikes trouble of any kind.
Bosco is related to Scruffy - they had the same father but different mothers.
Scruffy and Bosco are two years old.
Why so many cat photos, Jon?
Because I don't have any children or grandchildren to bore you with. Thank God.
I saved the best for last: photos of me naked.
(I just said that to see if you're still awake)
These are photos of the sunset last evening, after the storm. Taken from the front porch.
Well, it doesn't sound comfortable in Tennessee but it looks very beautiful. Don't forget the naked photos next time.
ReplyDeleteIt is very lovely here in TN and - despite all the inconveniences of rural living - I love it. I would post the naked photos but I don't want to frighten my readers.
DeleteI think I'd be more enlightened than frightened. The sunset pics are beautiful. Keep up the good work :-)
DeleteThank you, Dylan.
DeleteI knew - with your poetic soul and sense of good taste - that you would feel enlightened (*smile*)
Can you post a photo of the painting above Bosco?
ReplyDeleteJohn, I'll include it in my next post. Soon, I hope.
DeleteI have enough weeds of my own, thank you. Your pictures are pretty.
ReplyDeletePaula, I used to think the Texas weeds were big, but they can't compare with these giant TN weeds. They thrive in the endless rain.
DeleteI like the all the pix. and I can live without a naked pix; gotta leave some things to the imagination, dontcha know!
ReplyDelete"hillbilly estate" - heh heh heh; you could call it "hillbilly hills".
Hillbilly Hills definitely has a nice, homey ring to it.
DeleteWhaddaya mean you can live without naked pix??
Actually, my cats look better naked than I do....
Vindictive weeds and hard labor are not conducive to one's physical well being. Back in the day... there was something called a WEED for medicinal purposes and a better frame of mind. I am so jealous. How in the world did you get your three kitties to sit for those beautiful portraits? Mine refuse to sit still for 1 minute.
ReplyDeleteIt's truly almost IMPOSSIBLE to get good photos of the cats. As you said, they refuse to sit still. You have to have a camera ready at all times and be very quick about it.
DeleteI was able to snap a few pics while Scratch was rolling on the floor yesterday.
Scruffy never sits still. It was a rare opportunity for me to get her picture when she finally rested on a chest of drawers in my room the other day.
Bosco is the least active out of the three. And he doesn't mind being photographed.
Jon, rain or no rain, whatever you sprayed with Roundup (Glyphosate) will yellow and dry out in a week or two. But be careful: Monsanto uses a surfactant in it that amplifies its effects and the combination can hurt you. Wear gloves and long sleeves.
ReplyDeleteGeo - I started reading about Roundup, and the more I learned, the more worried I became about its toxic effects. I only sprayed Roundup along the front edge of my property near the road. All the weeds closer to the house were sprayed with a home-made potion that I made with vinegar and salt.
DeleteUnfortunately I was never big on environmental safety in the past, but this time I really became concerned about the animals and birds here - and even my cats. I don't want to taint this place with poisonous pesticides.
Normally, sunset images leave me feeling melancholy ... but these are arresting!
ReplyDeleteThe chest on which sweet Bosco is lolling? That 'sunburst'(?) pattern on the front has me doing a double-take. Do you happen to recall its origin? My mother had a near identical engraving done on a wooden chest by an Indian craftsman when they lived in Los Alamos.
Myra, I hit something on the keyboard which made my response to your comment disappear. I'll try again.
DeleteIt's difficult to see sunsets here because of all the trees and the mountains (that goes for sunrises, too). Sunsets are definitely melancholy, which is undoubtedly why I like them. I suppose they appeal to my brooding Hungarian nature.
Actually, that sunburst pattern is on the headboard of my bed. I kept that headboard only because my parents bought it for me long ago. They got it from a store in San Angelo, Texas. That's all I know about it.
Gorgeous sunset after the storm.
ReplyDeleteDoesn't sound like anyone but you sees the weeds. So if you want to let the place go wild and free nobody to say you can't, right? :)
I liked seeing your feline roommates/dependents. ;)
Actually, you're right about that and several other people have told me the same thing.
DeleteBut the weeds are so thick and tall that I have difficulty getting the car up to the garage, and they certainly could be a fire hazard.
I suppose I should just do what I can - - and don't try to kill myself in the process.
What a glorious sunset Jon. Isn't it interesting you went from no weeds or scrabble weeds to lush weeds with your move. I hope you have air conditioning. You certainly have a change of seasons now. Enjoy (if you can).
ReplyDeleteRon
I love the change of seasons. Unfortunately I don't have air conditioning, but I have several ceiling fans and two floor fans. The previous owner also left two window air conditioners, but I removed them because I don't like them in windows.
DeleteIt it wasn't for the constant rain, I'd be able to control the weeds......I think.
Weeds are a never ending battle. I used plastic sheets for awhile in the field of nightmares which worked pretty good. Your sunsets, wildflowers, and wonderful trees make up for those wretched weeds. It looks really nice.
ReplyDeleteWeeds are indeed an endless battle. I think I'd be able to conquer them, it if wasn't for the perpetual rainfall.
DeleteDon't call them weeds, call them a meadow habitat. Then it's all good!
ReplyDeleteKat!!! What a wonderful surprise!!!! It's so good to hear from you and I hope life is treating you well. You certainly deserve all good things.
DeleteWe've been together since the Blogging Stone Age.
A meadow habitat? I'll have to remember that.
IF you're talking about weeds you want dead, with no flowers around as casualties, you can hook up a hose with one of those large plastic jugs made for MIRACLE GROW and spray Epsom Salt water on them. Or plain salt. Then chant "die weeds, die". Did I neglect to mention that nudity is required and it must be done at high noon? Oh.....about the dead chicken you'll need......nevermind.
ReplyDeleteI never thought about Epsom Salt as a weed killer but it sounds like a good idea. At least it's not toxic (only to the weeds).
DeleteIf I go outside naked at high noon the weeds would probably die of shock - without the Epsom Salts.
It's been bloody hot here, too... in the high nineties, with is "nothing" compared to where Geo is. But we haven't seen much in the way of rain. According to this morning's newspaper, as of yesterday, Atlanta is officially in the midst of a severe drought. The only good thing I can say about all of the heat and sunshine here is we've been eating tomatoes from our garden since the middle of May. I don't remember EVER getting them this early in the past.
ReplyDelete