April showers bring May flowers.
In my neck of the Tennessee woods, April torrential rain brings mud that's five feet deep and monster "weeds" that grow twenty feet high within twenty-four hours.
The rain never stops pouring, the brush never stops growing.
I'm not complaining, of course. I'm merely describing my extraordinarily surroundings - just so you can experience them with vicarious enthusiasm.
I finally fixed my oven. It hasn't been working for months. In fact, it's been kaput for so long that I really didn't miss it.
It took over a month for me to finally find the parts I needed and get them shipped here (via Pony Express).
It took me several excruciating hours to repair the errant oven - - and when I finally finished, I was horrified to discover that I had hooked up some wires incorrectly
So I had to disassemble the whole damn thing and do it again.
Imagine my unmitigated delight when I turned the oven on and it was actually working!!!!
I have no idea what "unmitigated" means, but it seemed like a wonderful word to incorporate in this post.
Trust me - I have no technical abilities or electrical skills. I had no freaking clue what I was doing, but my cluelessness was a success.
Spell Check just informed me that there's no such word as "cluelessness".
Right. There's no such thing as "election fraud", either.
I just threw that in to piss off you miserable humorless Liberals.
While I was working on the oven, my cat Bosco kept leaping into the oven! I'm not jesting. The cat was eternally annoying, so I had to lock him in the bedroom until my work was complete.
The other day, he jumped into the refrigerator when I opened it!!!! Weird cat.
Actually, I didn't miss the oven very much. I got along fine with my microwave and a small electric oven. Last week I baked some spice cakes in the little electric oven (I used small loaf pans).
My small electric oven
I'm sure this is overwhelmingly fascinating.
That's because I'm overwhelmingly fascinating.
Three people agree with me. Alright, maybe two.
The rest of you heathens don't even bother to comment, but I know you're there.
Yesterday I went to my car to retrieve a thirty-pound bag of cat litter from the trunk. As I tried to lift it, the bag ripped open and thirty-pounds of cat litter spilled in the trunk! Not easy to clean up.
More rain and severe storms are expected tomorrow. And we're supposed to get frost this weekend.
The possibility of May flowers seems remote.
Cheers, Jon
