I'm interrupting my saccharine Hollywood posts to inject a toxic dose of my present reality.
So, how are things going in the wilderness, Jon?
Well,
The clothes dryer is still kaput,
the microwave still isn't working,
the animals in the roof are managing to rip out some of the insulation,
and as of yesterday the furnace isn't working properly.
My water bill TRIPLED because I had to keep the faucets running so the pipes wouldn't freeze.
My heating bill is so high that I almost went into cardiac arrest when I saw it (and I'm extremely frugal about using the heat)
I put several important letters in the mailbox over a week ago and was horrified to see (yesterday) that the mail carrier never picked them up!
One of them was the payment for my property taxes.
The only good news is that it finally stopped raining for a day.
I would do an interpretative Dance of Joy, but my back hurts too damn much.
I had to drive to town yesterday. The only good news is that I DIDN'T get a migraine headache this time (like I did the last two times).
BUT I forgot to buy trash bags (AGAIN!) and toilet paper (AGAIN!!) and brackets for some shelves that I'm putting up.
Aside:
Awhile ago, one irate blogger chastised me for mentioning toilet paper. "It's impolite" she said.
Relax, sweetheart. We ALL use it. Even the Pope.
I had a problem buying cat food in Walmart (again!!). They are all out of Purina Complete (again) - which is my cat's favorite food.
Then - - -
way, way, way back on a top shelf, I saw a bag of Purina Complete......but it was so FAR back that I couldn't reach it.
I stood on the lowest shelf, but still couldn't reach it.
I tried various other methods of attempting to grasp the bag but failed every time.
I'm 6 foot 1 inch tall and have long arms, but the bag of Purina was unreachable.
I scanned the store for an employee but none were around.
It's ironic that Walmart employees are constantly in your way - but when you need one, they all disappear.
Finally, I saw an employee - but she was about 89 years old and four feet tall.
Shit. I went home Purina-less.
I have a lot more to bitch about - but I'll spare you.
I haven't been reading blogs lately, and I haven't been responding to your comments on my blog - but I love all of you (except the trolls, of course).
Don't abandon me.
Still stopping by, you remind me why I love living in civilization.
ReplyDeleteI have very mixed feelings about it (more mixed than ever...), but I think I'd still take annoying wild animals to annoying neighbors.
DeleteSeriously? Now your mail carrier is ignoring you? Oh, don't get me started on the U.S. Postal (non) Service!
ReplyDeleteOn the bright side(!), no migraine. YAY! Better start carrying a cane with you to Wal-Mart … when folks aren't feeling sorry for you, you could always use it as a hook to retrieve the cat food.
This might be hard to believe - but one of my initial thoughts when trying to retrieve the Purina was "I wish I had a cane or something to snag that bag!"
DeleteI could definitely use a cane because of my bad back - but it would make me look 30 years older than I am.
I'm dismayed that the little old clerk didn't offer to go find someone to get that bag down for you! You could also have asked at the register, stepped aside, and waited until they brought it to you. Tell them you have a bad back. You have every right to get some help. If you're pleasant about it and thank them people can be very helpful--most of the time, anyways. But I imagine it is hard to work up the energy when you're feeling deflated. :(
ReplyDeleteThe mail!! Not picking up the mail! If they can get to your mailbox there's no reason for them to not pick up your mail. I'd call the post office on that one. Seriously! Can cost you fines and problems galore!
Always something, isn't there? Winter bills can be the pits! Well, and summer if you have and need air conditioning can be awful, too. Cars are a never ending expense, too. But so are cats--and we love them. ;) They are worth it. ;)
I definitely should have asked for assistance in Walmart, but whenever I go shopping I like to remain as unobtrusive as possible. Hopefully they'l,l have a new supply of Purina next time I go there.
DeleteThe mail carrier is usually pretty good about retrieving my out-going mail. He may have missed it this time because of all the rotten weather and endless torrential rain.....or maybe he was drunk....
The problems in life never end. It's always one unpleasant thing after another.
I don’t read many blogs these days, but I always check out your current entries because you make me laugh. I also enjoy the things I read between the lines on your blog.
ReplyDeleteYou've endured me for a long time, Donna, and I really appreciate it. There are many times when I actually make myself laugh - and I always encourage my readers to read between the lines.
DeleteI wish I had the courage to write what I really think...but I'd be too offensive (*smile*)
I'm with Rita on the demand for help. Assertion, I love that word. It kind of flows off the tongue. Some people say these things are sent to try us... how right they are! Have a nice day, Jon.
ReplyDeleteUnfortunately I seldom utilize assertion - which probably explains why my life is so messed up. You have a nice day, too, Valerie!
ReplyDeleteI'm glad to hear things are looking up. :) HA!
ReplyDeleteI know you like being able to look out your windows, but one way to help keep your place a tad warmed in the winter would be to put heavy-duty plastic over them. We did that for years. I hated the way it looked, but it did keep the cold air out quite well.
Mentioning toilet paper is "rude?" That's funny. Some years ago, I got what I thought was an absolutely hilarious idea. (Ahem, some alcohol may have been involved...) Anyhow, I thought it would be a hoot to create a book comprised of photos of famous people sitting on the toilet. Just think of it... the queen in all of her finery, including crown... the pope, in all of HIS finery... movies stars, dressed as they did in their most iconic roles... groups of musicians sitting side-by-side... like the Beatles, what have you. It would be done "tastefully," of course. HA! Thinking about that kind of book still cracks me up...
The toilet book is a great idea - but I think you'd have some difficulty getting people to "pose" for the pictures. Well, maybe the Pope would - after having a few beers...
DeletePlastic over the windows is even a better idea than the toilet book (*smile*) but I'd go crazy not being able to look out.
I don't suppose UPS or FedEx delivers up to you? Order your cat food and toilet paper, paper towels etc. on line and have them delivered maybe? I enjoy your crazy, funny blog. Wendy
ReplyDeleteUPS does deliver way out here (I happened to see the truck go by a few times), but trying to get up the muddy hill to my house isn't easy.
DeleteOrdering on line is definitely a great idea - but I'd worry about receiving the deliveries.
Thanks for visiting my blog, Wendy!