THE AGONY CONTINUES

This is a possible, or perhaps probable, continuation of my previous post.

I was so intensely overjoyed when I finally got connected to the Internet again, that I almost did an interpretative Dance of Elation - but it would have destroyed my bad back and probably put me in traction.

Good thing I didn't dance. My joy was short-lived. 

My Internet connection lasted less than 24 hours.

I was doing work on my laptop, in bed, late at night, during a horrendous thunderstorm. An urgent weather alert warned me that the storm was severe and I should seek shelter immediately.

Shelter? Where? Under the bed? In the neighboring forest?

The deafening thunder encouraged my cat Bosco to take shelter under the bed covers.
I watched the lightning from the bedroom window in awestruck amazement.

Then it happened:

A massive lightning bolt zapped down with atomic power and struck the front of my property. It hit with the force of a bomb and seemed to be streaked with fire, like the hand of God.

The most incredibly amazing part of this incident is that the EXACT thing happened nearly two years ago, in July, 2020. A lightning bolt struck my property almost in the same place!! (I wrote a blog post about it, which lurks somewhere in the archives).

Needless to say, there was a power outage - and my computer and landline phone were dead.

I think it happened on Thursday night. Friday was a useless day, because I knew I'd have to wait through the weekend before anyone from my Internet customer service brigade could come out and survey the problem.

I called today (via cell phone). The service guy came surprisingly fast and restored my computer and landline phone.

With the luxury of having Internet access again, I immediately got online and paid all my monthly bills.
Who knows when the next storm will blow in with another Biblical lightning bolt?

I just realized that I haven't recently been posting any photos on my blog.
Well, hell, I'm interesting even without photos
(he says with a wry smile)

Here are some breathtakingly amazing photos of my bedroom window - from which I saw the lightning bolt.
I always love looking out the window from my bed - even at night. Even during storms.

 

 

A view from my bed.

I now have blinds on the windows, but seldom use them.

NOTE:

I'm still having enormous problems with Blogger. I am generally forced to comment anonymously on some blogs - - and on other blogs I'm unable to comment at all. Apologies to Myra and Kim - - I can no longer leave comments on your blogs. The comment "icon" doesn't work!!

THE AGONY CONTINUES

My adventure in the mud on Tuesday was like a ride at Disneyland compared to what I went through on Wednesday.

Due to weeks (months?) of rotten weather I've been postponing my (dreaded) drive to town. The fact that I was completely out of supplies forced me to finally go yesterday (Wednesday). I had no choice. My only alternative was to stay here and perish with the cats......
......who would live longer than me because they'd eat my carcass after I croaked from starvation.

After enduring more rain than Noah ever imagined, there was (finally!) a miraculous break in the clouds early Wednesday morning. Seizing the unbelievably rare moment, I hurriedly dressed and stumbled out to the car - fervently praying that I could somehow get to town before the next deluge.

Just as I turned the ignition key (in the car), God must have woken up and noticed my good fortune. The heavens unleashed a torrent of rain.

Desperate, defiant, and completely against my better judgement, I ignored the deluge and headed for the narrow, winding mountain road which began the endlessly agonizing trek to town.

The rain was so heavy that my windshield wipers were useless, the windows kept steaming up, and my contact lenses were foggy. 
By the time I got to town my legs had turned into two strands of linguini and crowbars were required to pry my hands from the steering wheel.

Let's skip the joys of shopping in Walmart and take you on the journey home.

The rain was still relentless as I left town and began the trek home. My astonishment knew no bounds when a thick mountain fog appeared out of nowhere.

Tennessee is the only place where I've ever seen heavy fog and torrential rain at the same time.
It's also the only place where I've sweated blood and shit in my pants while driving in it.

I'll never know how I (FINALLY) made it home, but my Hallelujahs were rudely interrupted when - halfway up the hill - I got stuck in the mud. Again. Just like I did the day before. Only worse.

It was still pouring rain. The car wouldn't budge. The very thought of trying to haul $200 worth of supplies up the hill to the house was beyond the realm of possibilities.

I do my best to look tough, but in reality I'm a delicate pansy with health issues that would rival those of Camille.
Crippled back, bad knee, tricky hip - - not to mention heart palpitations that are more irregular than a pair of underwear purchased at the Dollar Store.

Sorry - my pathetic attempts to be witty are presently in Desperation Mode.

I staggered up to the house (through mud and ten-foot weeds) and changed my clothes. Then I dragged eight large pieces of cardboard from the garage to the car.
Placed them under the front and back of the tires for a semblance of traction.

Inch by inch - - and I mean inch by agonizing inch - - I managed to coax the obstinate car up the hill .
I started around noon and didn't successfully complete the task until 3:30 p.m. No lie.

The car kept rolling back into the mud. The tires slipped and screeched. I had to crawl out of the car every three minutes to readjust the muddy, sopping wet cardboard. I had to stop and rest frequently. My heart was pounding like a lovesick bunny. I felt like I was having a heart attack.

It was nearly dark when the car was safely ensconced near the garage and I started dragging groceries into the house. The perishables were getting soggy.

Your post is getting too damn long, Jon, and your readers are getting extremely restless.

Lighten up, Kemosabe. This is free, breathtaking entertainment that they couldn't find on any other blog.

Should I mention that an hour after I got the perishables into the refrigerator and freezer, there was a violent storm and another power outage?

The power wasn't restored until around 4:00 in the morning (Thursday).

I'm so goddamed exhausted that I don't think my power will ever be restored again. 


My usual humor is sorely lacking in this post. I'm definitely not in a funny mood.....