Thursday, July 27, 2017

AROUND THE HOUSE



I always like Q &A's so I lifted this one from Myra's blog
It's called Around the House. There's a question for every room.

BEDROOM
What's your sleep schedule?

Sleep? Schedule?? ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha 
I haven't had a sleep schedule since I was in high school. I'm inherently nocturnal and usually get by with as little sleep as possible. Four hours. Six at the most.
Presently, I go to bed at dawn and get up around 9:00 or 10:00 in the morning. Once in awhile I'll nap for an hour in late afternoon.

KITCHEN
Favorite comfort food? 

That's a tough one because it completely depends on my mood. Are we talking snacks?
How about cheese crackers with Cheez Whiz?
Peanut butter on an apple...or on a chocolate bar. Chocolate mint ice cream. Pizza!!! Pizza, any time, anywhere.

WASHROOM
Showers or baths? Bubbles? Bath bombs?

Showers, definitely. I've always maintained that if you take a bath, you're soaking in your own filth.
But
long ago, in California, I used to occasionally indulge in baths - surrounded by scented candles. I can be romantic at unexpected moments.

So - what the hell is a "bath bomb"??
Is that when someone blows a fart in the tub and unexpected bubbles surface?  

CLOSET
Sum up your style in a few words.

Disaster. Not nearly enough space. My house in Texas had huge walk-in closets. Here in the Tennessee boonies my closets are cramped.  

PARLOR
Favorite party or board games?

First of all, I haven't heard the term "parlor" used since F. Scott Fitzgerald was courting Zelda Sayre.

Party games? How about strip poker?
Actually, I haven't played a board game since I was a kid. I loved Monopoly, Why?, and Clue.

LIVING ROOM 
What do you like to do with your family?

A challenging game of Russian Roulette.
.....but seriously - I like to entertain my cats. And they love to drive me crazy.

DINING ROOM
Special occasion food?

Heck, I haven't had a "special occasion" since the Suffragettes were marching in London.  
Can't think of anything clever for this one. Perhaps steak and champagne.
Perhaps....

GARDEN
Favorite tree? Flower?

Maple. Oak. Weeping Willow.
Gardenias. White roses. Honeysuckle.

ATTIC
What's one thing you have a sentimental attachment to and you will never throw away?  

I have to get serious here, which I'm very reluctant to do.
The things I cherished more than anything on earth were my diaries and journals (over forty hand-written volumes) and all the piano music that belonged to my mother and grandmother (over 100 manuscripts).

They were among the many items the movers "lost" when I moved to Tennessee.  

LIBRARY
Favorite book genre?

As a voracious reader, I like anything. But my favorites tend to be biographies and memoirs.
And good old horror stories - - not the crap that's written nowadays.

OFFICE
If you could have any job in the world, what would it be?

I'd like to be the Pope.
I could wear crowns, robes, costly jewels. People would worship me, kiss my hand, kiss my ass.

I could molest choir boys.  

Guest Room
Have you been to a sleep over? If so, when was your first? Do you like them?

Depends on whom I'm sleeping with.
He says with a smile.

Actually I can only remember one sleep over, when I was ten.
We stayed over at the home of a boy named Bernie, who was very effeminate. In the middle of the night, Bernie suggested that we should all get naked. In eager anticipation, he suffered a severe asthma attack and had to be rushed to the hospital.

I swear to God, that's a true story! 

FOYER
Do you prefer small gatherings, large parties, or one-on-one meetings?

One-on-one meetings. I guess.

PANTRY
Favorite meal to make?

Hungry Man TV dinner.
Are they getting smaller? One usually isn't enough to satisfy my appetite.  

LAUNDRY
Favorite and least favorite chores?

Least favorite: cooking, washing dishes, cleaning floors.
Favorite (?): dusting, washing windows.

GARAGE
Favorite mode of transportation?
Favorite car?

Rickshaw. Train. Pack mule.

Favorite car is this 1929 Packard. Yes!!!
I'm in love!!!

   
POWDER ROOM
Do you wear make-up? If so, what item can't you live without?

Are you jesting? Hell, I don't need make-up. I need an embalmer.

PANIC ROOM
What was the most nerve wracking experience you've ever had?

I've had so many nerve-wracking experiences that I get panic attacks just thinking of them.
When I was unconscious and almost died from a SEVERE reaction to Penicillin.
When I worked the midnight shift  ALL ALONE with a man who turned out to be a serial killer (no joke - I wrote a blog post about it).
When I came face-to-face with a mountain lion in Nevada.   

My life is worthy of a book. And I'm working on it..... 

    

        
    

 

30 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. I wanted to find a funny photo of a hillbilly house and when I saw that on the Internet I thought it was perfect.

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  2. I enjoyed this a lot and was laughing the whole way through, especially at the crack about the parlor. Then the story of the sleep over???? OMG!!! Just his luck...he finally gets you all naked then that happens. I too am inherently nocturnal....the mornings are beautiful, but much prefer the quite of night and a starry sky. Thanks for the laugh...I knew it would be, just by the opening picture you chose. You are in rare form today me friend!!! 💋

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    1. I'm always delighted when I can make people laugh - my sense of humor is one of the few things I have left....
      I always seem to function my best between the hours of dusk and dawn. It has to do with my vampiric Hungarian blood.

      As for Bernie (my friend Bernard), he became a scientist when he grew up. I encountered him once (briefly) at Claremont College when we were in our early twenties.

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  3. Aha! Glad to hear you are working on your memoirs!!
    Panic Room? Who has (or can afford) a panic room? Parlor? How quaint. And to actually have a real library--wow! Can you imagine! With all those books, leather furniture, tables and a big desk--now that would be a dream.

    Fun questions! Pope--oh you naughty boy--LOL! Have you watched any of The Young Pope with Jude Law? I watched a few episodes but it just was oddly off kilter and didn't grab me. If I can't relate in some way with the main character I tend to lose interest.

    Have a great day. I hope it is cooler for you. :)

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    1. I would actually love to have a parlor and a library. Heck, I'd spend all my time in the library room!

      It took me awhile to think of what kind of job I'd like to have. Suddenly I thought of the Pope and it seemed hilarious.
      I haven't seen "The Young Pope" but that's because I no longer have a television. I only watch the news live stream on YouTube.

      It's supposed to be cooler tomorrow with thunderstorms.

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  4. I throughly enjoyed this glimpse into your life Jon. Laughed heartily that you stated you need an embalmer!!

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    1. Thanks for the input, Susan! I thought the embalmer thing was my funniest line (well, that and the Pope...).

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  5. this was fun and informative. funny i don't see you as a pizza eating kind of guy. i love weeping willows too. and am glad you lived to tell about your reaction to Penicillin. i am severely allergic also.

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    1. There are some gorgeous weeping willows around here that my cousin showed me. I've loved pizza ever since I was a small kid - - and, admittedly - it was much better back then (especially in New Jersey and New York).

      I had pneumonia when I was eighteen and was given a shot of Penicillin. I was unconscious for ever twenty minutes and almost died. The incident made me terrified of doctors and injections ever since. I still panic every time I need to get a shot (which, thankfully, isn't often).

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    2. I meant to say "over" twenty minutes, not "ever"

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  6. Have you ever posted about your face to face with a Mountain Lion?

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    1. I think I wrote about it on my old blog "Lone Star Concerto", but I'll probably write about it again. It's worth a re-run.

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  7. I'm soooo glad you did this, Jon!
    One of these days, surreptitiously reading on my cell phone is going to get me in trouble ... particularly when I snort aloud!
    Bath bombs! ... the Pope! ... but best of all? When I pasted your Russian quote into Google tranlate. Woo-hoo!

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    1. I knew you'd enjoy this, Myra - but I apologize for making you snort aloud while on your cell phone.

      I'm positive that I made some new enemies with the Russian quote on my sidebar. I really don't give a damn. I'm thoroughly DISGUSTED with all the hate that's spewing on some other blogs.

      I actually posted that quote for one specific person who loathes me but has been hanging around for two years.

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    2. The Trump haters are lucky that I don't write what I REALLY think. I'm trying to be restrained and polite

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  8. Jon, I delight in the photo of the dwelling up top. It reminds me of the house I spent my first 9 years in --a home that started life as a 1920s service station. Now I live in a crazy old farm house --is America GREAT or what? In short, I'm delighted with your whole post --even if you like Trump. We both know how rapidly the pendulum swings by now --common ground with deep substrates: we like peace.

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    1. The hillbilly house in the photo is kinda cute - but I'm not sure about that chimney. I love crazy old farm houses - and I have no doubt that yours is a crazy old cozy, creative, and well-crafted farm house.

      Peace is definitely the most important thing. As a staunch pessimist, I tend to think peace will never be attained.....but I'm still hopeful...

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  9. Have you ever posted about your face to face with a Mountain Lion?


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    ReplyDelete
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    1. I wrote about the mountain lion long ago in my old blog "Lone Star Concerto". Since many people haven't heard the story, I plan to write about it again in the not-too-distant future.
      Thanks for your comment!

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  10. From that perfect hillbilly house picture to the last line, this was a terrific post. Lots of funny lines in it. I especially liked the ones about being pope, about being embalmed, and the word "parlor." One thing surprised me. I didn't picture you as being a guy who liked TV dinners... :) I figured you were more of a fine dining kinda guy.

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  11. I discovered (when I'm writing) that my blog posts are more humorous when I don't think about what I'm going to say and remain completely spontaneous. I simply write down what is racing through my head. I'm glad it amused you!

    I used to be a fancy fine dining type of guy, but now that I live entirely alone in the boonies I really don't care what I eat - and I try to make it as simple as possible.

    I do occasionally eat Hungry Man dinners - solely because they are simple. And I truly do think the portions are getting smaller. They should be called Hungry Child dinners.

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  12. http://lonewolfconcerto.blogspot.com/search?q=mountain+lion

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    1. Thanks for reminding me of this!! I knew I had written about it, but I thought it was on my old blog. Upon re-reading it, I'm not particularly fond of the post. I'll probably write a new version sometime.

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    2. Oh, you are so bad ( I desperately wanted to comment on your most recent post)!

      Regarding the board games you mentioned in this post: Has everyone totally forgotten Masterpiece?

      I literally was introduced to fine art from this so-called children's game. Hell, I didn't know a Warhol from a Picasso. Masterpiece inspired me to do much needed research ASAP.

      Let the Capitalists shamelessly glory in Monopoly. The world needs more board games like Masterpiece to remind us that there is such a thing as art. Sadly, even fine art is now more about money than what the artist was trying to share and express with the world. Poor Vincent :-)

      P.S. Excellent post!

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    3. You're always so sweet, Dylan - that's one of the many reasons I "like" you. I would have never thought of Masterpiece, but I do remember it. I think one of my cousins had it, but I never played it. I really do miss board games.

      I'm glad you weren't offended by my recent post. I very often say things tongue in cheek, simply to annoy people.

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  13. Fascinating Jon! Again, you've given me a good idea for a blog post. I feel so bad you lost your journals. I used to keep a journal (diary) from 1976 to 1980. I stopped keeping it when a "friend" (a homeless guy who I let stay in my apartment) read it and discovered that I suspected he was a hustler (he was) and tore out ten pages and scribbled in pencil "I AM NOT A HUSTLER!" That killed my journal keeping habits for years. However, in April of 2007 I started to keep a journal again and continue do so unto this day. Now I regret I didn't continue keeping my journals back in 1980 until today because those were indeed interesting periods of my life. I go back and read my old journal from the 70's now and am amazed and what I did and where I did it. Of course half the names I don't remember but it is interesting to read about "that" Ron back then. I doubt if anyone will be interested in reading my journals now after I'm gone. I only keep them now for my own therapy. Again, I am so sorry the movers lost your journals. I was hoping they would have shown up by now.
    Ron

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    1. Ron, I was a FOOL not to take the journals with me when I moved from TX to TN,but I was driving a small Toyota with THREE cats in cages. There was hardly enough room for me....

      You are one of the few people who understand how important journals are. As you said, it's amazing and interesting to read about the past and all the things that went on in our lives. I also kept records of all my piano concerts, all the famous people I met, and - of course - a my sexual exploits. I even kept photos of my lovers in those diaries.
      thirty years of writing are gone forever.

      I wonder who the hell is reading them......

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  14. Awesome blog, i always enjoy & read the post you are sharing!
    Thank for your very good article...!

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    1. I really appreciate that. Thank you!!

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